5 Ways to Fail with your Spell Work

1. Willy Nilly Substitutions

Now, before everyone starts bashing me for this one, let me clarify! On one hand, I do believe that those tried and true spells that have been passed on for generations should be left as is. After all, they have a proven success rate. On the other hand, I do realize that many times we may not have a particular ingredient and may NEED to substitute something else. The thing is, when we are making substitutions, it's extremely important to research the QUALITIES of the ingredient we are needing to find a substitute FOR and making sure that we choose an ingredient that matches those qualities. I've seen so many comments and posts that haphazardly ask for a substitute for a particular ingredient and well meaning people sharing what they would substitute with. I can only hope that the person asking will then take the time to research for themselves to be certain. You wouldn't want to inadvertently substitute with something that may offer slightly different qualities. 

2. Lack of Focus

There are many new practitioners who wrongly believe that simply lighting a candle and walking away will produce the desired results. Sadly, this is not the case. Focusing on your intention as your spell is working can be a rather important part in the process and one that is often neglected. It is so important to clearly visualize the outcome you are shooting for. Seeing it as though it is real in your minds eye. And even more than that- FEELING it. Allowing yourself to actually experience the emotions that you KNOW you will have once this manifests. 

Now, here's the thing with focus.... 

When I say it's important to have focus... I mean, WHILE you are doing your spell. When you've consecrated, anointed and lit your candle (for example); you may find better results if you sit in front of that candle and do your meditation- visualizing the outcome, etc. Even if you have to leave the candle for a time (because it's a taper candle or simply takes longer to burn down); you'll want to be sure that you remain nearby and at the very least, intermittently look at your candle and focus on your outcome. 

AFTER your candle has burned down- you'll want to TRUST and have FAITH that your spell has been successful. KNOW that the universe has things in the works to bring about your desired outcome. ACT as though this is already happening. 

3. Being a Micro Manager

You walk into work Monday morning and your boss gives you ONE task to do for the entire week. You're pretty excited about doing this because you know you've done it so many times before and you know exactly how to get it done. You got this! 

A few hours later, your boss is looking over your shoulder questioning your methods. All week he's popping his head in your office checking up on your work and offering his advice on how to do it better. So, what was meant to be a quick and easy work assignment turns into an absolute nightmare for you! You want to turn around and shout at him "If you think you can do it better, then just DO IT yourself!!"

Nobody likes a micro-managing boss. Remember, "as above, so below".... same holds true for the spirit realm! When we start micro managing HOW our spell is supposed to manifest, we are micro managing! When we get a new job, it often comes with a JOB DESCRIPTION. We are supposed to be responsible for what's listed on that job description and avoid taking on the duties and tasks that aren't in our job description. The "HOW" part of spell workings is NOT in our job description! That's the universe's job. (Or whatever deity you've called upon for help). When we do a spell and then constantly look for the outcome to come to us in the way WE expect it to.... we are imposing limits on a limitless universe. When Jeff does a spell for an extra $500 bucks to come his way in the month of December and then only focuses on whether or not he's getting that Holiday Bonus from work- he's placing limits on the universe. Quite possibly, the universe planned on bringing that money in a very different way. Maybe it was coming in smaller amounts from other sources. Maybe it was coming in the form of winning a new flat screened television in a raffle he had entered. Poor Jeff will never know since he's only looking at the HOW that HE was planning for. 

4.  Being a "Doubting Thomas"

Consider this scenario-- it's been four days since Janice did her candle spell and she hasn't seen any indication of it working yet. Her ex-boyfriend is still dating someone else and hasn't responded to her last text message. Out of frustration, she tells her best friend "he's never coming back! he'll probably even marry this new girl!" ..... What did Janice just do here? I'll tell you what she did... she just screwed up her entire spell. In fact, she just spoke into existence the exact OPPOSITE of what she wanted! Don't be like Janice!!!! Cut out the negative talk, texts and posts!! There is NO room for doubt in spell work! 

5. Getting super disappointed 

So, you've done your spell and nothing happened. You did that money spell 3 weeks ago and with one week left in the month, you've gotten a whopping $0 .... So you start getting depressed. And anxious about how you're gonna pay those bills. And even though you don't actually SAY anything negative (because you know damn well you don't wanna SPEAK that negativity into existence!)... your inner self starts thinking of what you're going to do when you can't pay those bills. Our thoughts and emotions play a big part in our spell workings. Remember the old saying... If you think you CAN, you're right... and if you think you CAN'T... well, you're right, too! Allowing that sadness, melancholy, and anxiety to creep into your thoughts can have a negative impact on the outcome you're trying to achieve. And believe me, I know it's normal to have those feelings and thoughts. We've been conditioned all of our lives with those thoughts. But I also know how important it is to recognize them, acknowledge them for what they are and then symbolically PUSH them out of your mind. They do nothing to serve you. Instead, think of all the possibilities that the universe may bring your way in that final hour!!!  

Eliminating these 5 bad habits from your spell casting will help you to experience the results that you're looking for! There's a lot more to spell workings than just what I have posted here, but these issues have been the most common ones that I have seen in people who struggle with success. Share in the comments below- any other ways that you've seen or experienced with spells that don't seem to manifest! I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Do you KNOW yourself? Do you Accept yourself?

When you know yourself, you are empowered. When you accept yourself, you are invincible!

A simple quote with so much meaning! But... what DOES it mean? What does it mean to "know yourself"? I mean, really know yourself. 

To know yourself means to know your beliefs, to know what you like and don't like and what you'll stand for and what you won't stand for. In other words- you've set some boundaries. It involves an awareness of WHO you are as a person. 

I am a spiritual person who holds various views on spiritual issues that I have come to learn over a period of YEARS. I like staying home and I dislike being excessively social. I am accepting of others views; but I won't tolerate others pushing those views on me. Knowing these things about myself has resulted in a feeling of empowerment. Much like a newly trained employee who is being sent into the workforce... you know, like a college kid! You've got some values and belief and you are excited to stand in your truth. 

But, often times; we stand in our truth and don't expect the backlash that comes. Maybe we aren't prepared, or as prepared as we thought we were. In those times, a person may begin to doubt their truth. They may become unsure of the position they've taken or the path they've chosen. 

The second part is ACCEPTANCE

When we ACCEPT ourselves, however; we become invincible. Accepting ourselves includes accepting that even if our truth or beliefs don't jive with the rest of the worlds; we are okay with that. This is me and I am comfortable with the ME that I am. Acceptance is just that; a trust and confidence in where I stand on certain topics; be they large or small. 

When I am acting like a "bitch"... I am OWNING that shit!! That is ME. And I am okay with the ME that I am, even if others around me aren't comfortable with it or even LIKE it. The opinions of others are none of my business!!

So, I ask you this: Do you KNOW yourself? And even more so, do you ACCEPT yourself for who you are, flaws and all? 

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The Biggest Lie I've Ever Told

We've all told a lie at some point in our lives... no matter how upright and ethical you claim your life to be or try to be. And I suspect, for many of us, we continue to tell lies.... in fact, I can almost guarantee this!

You see one of the biggest lies I've ever told is this... 

"I'm fine"

And I have a strong feeling that 90% (or more) of the people reading this have told that very same lie!

For so many, when asked how they are doing; the rote answer of "I'm fine" is what comes out of their mouth. We wonder 'does this person truly want to know?' Saying anything else may bring a slew of questions with it. "I'm lonely" would likely bring comments telling the person all the reasons they SHOULDN'T be lonely or shouldn't feel that way, rather than validating the emotion. 

Other friends may offer up recommendations on how to NOT be lonely. All of these with good intentions of course. But none of them acknowledging the emotional response and simply allowing for space to be held. 

Plus, let's face it; the mere thought of a different response causes us to consider how uncomfortable it will make not only us, but the other person as well. 

What might change on an interpersonal level, if we eliminated the phrase "I'm fine" from our lingo? How would our relationships be changed if instead we allowed our authentic emotion at that time to be shared and exposed?

I have pondered those questions a bit here and there. On one hand, I wonder if in being more authentic in that regard would alienate people from each other. After all, most people don't want to be face to face with uncomfortable feelings and issues in themselves, never mind in another person. 

On the other hand, quite possibly, being more authentic in our response has the ability to allow us to have a more human experience. Allowing us to serve and help each other on a more intimate level. 

Do you find yourself responding with "I'm fine" when you truly don't mean it? What do YOU think would happen if, instead, we answered with how we really feel?

Expand YOUR knowledge with my online self-guided courses!!! 

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• Cartomancy: Divining with Playing Cards

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Know Your Circle.... Not Everyone Is Rowing With You.

You know that old saying... it goes something like this: Not everyone in your boat may be helping you paddle.... some may be drilling holes when you're not looking. It speaks to the importance of truly knowing the people in your "tribe"; those that are supposed to be on your "team". We all have "haters" in our lives... but when those "haters" are people you THOUGHT were supporters... it stings a bit. 

I suppose I shouldn't be so naive! I've lived long enough to have seen this happen over and over again. The fact is, it seems inevitable that there will be people that (for some reason) choose to remain in your circle, despite the fact that they really don't want to see you succeed. 

And, once again, this was made abundantly clear to me just the other day. People I had thought were on the same projectory to a successful team... showed that they were in fact on a very different plane that I was. Words meant to inspire and create action were met with disdain and disgust. 

It was a tough pill to swallow; but the harsh reality was that these were not "my people". They were not a part of my "tribe". Oh, they may have been at one time. But just like energy flows ever changing, so do people and thus so does our tribe. Sometimes, as you're in a forward moving momentum- those around you choose not to keep the same pace. And that's okay. Every one of us is trekking our journeys at our own personal pace. 

But alas, it happens. And we can't allow that vibe to keep us in a place of low vibration or stagnation. And so we press forward... But, how best to deal with it? Well, I'm never REALLY sure. I do believe that you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. So, with that being said- all the prodding and inspiring in the world won't make some people stick with you. And so with those people I try to dissociate. Make a space between us; a separation. 

In some cases, we simply aren't able to remove those people from our lives. Maybe they are family or people that we work with. For those people, I try to distance myself as much as possible. After all, their presence in my life only serves to hold me back. And by ALLOWING them to hold that space... I am ALLOWING them to keep (or try to keep) me in a place of stagnation and slow growth... to meet THEIR perception of success. 

It is vital to keep your passion burning regardless of the "haters". Because ultimately, the vibe you keep putting out will undoubtedly attract the tribe that's meant for you. Those with the same mindset - who are operating at a similar vibrational frequency. They will gravitate towards you, while others fade away. Remembering yet another saying: Your vibe attracts your tribe!

In some ways we can think of it like high school. I always told my teenage children- don't worry who does or doesn't like you in high school, in 5 years you'll never even hear from any of those people - friend OR foe. And I find it similar with our "tribes" or circle of friends throughout our life. Only a select few will remain with you for the long haul, often waxing and waning in and out of our lives throughout. The rest will fade away, replaced by people who are walking the same path at the same time as us. And that is just how it is meant to be.....

Do you stay PRESENT even in the UNCOMFORTABLE times of life??

I can remember being pregnant with my fifth child and one of the biggest "lessons" I learned from that time. As so many people who have had children know, when you are pregnant with your first child everything is so new and "unknown"... Then as you are pregnant with subsequent children, you really FEEL everything so much more. You feel those Braxton Hicks contractions more. You seem to feel everything MORE. 

Well, during the time I was pregnant with my fifth and last child, I went through a period during the final three months where I was just done! I can remember feeling as though if I could just take this heavy belly OFF for a little while and pack it away in a closet... just for some relief. I was quite large... rotund... heavy.... ;) and I was tired! 

As I was driving in the car one day the thought occurred to me... 'this is where you're meant to be right now'. It was a tough pill to swallow at the time when I was FEELING all of the discomforts of pregnancy so vividly! But I let myself simmer with that thought for a bit and started to have a lovely realization. Yes, this IS where I am meant to be at this moment in life. I am exactly where I needed to be. And I could lament the discomforts... OR I could savor them, knowing that I would never be here again. 

Through the remainder of that pregnancy, I revisited that thought many more times... including when I was in labor! And it was then that I began to train my mind to be more PRESENT in each moment. EVEN the moments that don't seem comfortable! I began to really apply this principle to every area of my life. The good times AND the not so good times!

I am here and I am present. This moment in time may not be one of the most comfortable moments, but I am here for a reason. It may be a lesson to learn. It may only be to experience the contrasts in life. But it is THE MOMENT that I am meant to be in at this time in this life. And I will FEEL all of the feelings that come with that moment. And I will allow myself to experience those feelings in their fullest, being grateful... and appreciative... that I am able to experience this moment so fully. And I will own them... if only for that moment; because, good or bad,  I know that the moment will not last forever! 

I challenge you to acknowledge the moment in time that you are experiencing right now! Allow yourself to be totally present in the moment! 

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Are you in a CREATIVE SLUMP?? Add Fire!

Fire Qualities 

Have you ever sat in front of a bon-fire or fireplace and found yourself mesmerized by the flames? Or even lit a candle and found yourself getting into a sort of trance state as you focus on the candle flame? 

Fire gazing can actually put you in a meditative state. One of the qualities of fire is that it is both creative and destructive. Fire is one of the five elements (fire, water, earth, air and spirit). The element of fire can spark creativity within us and drive us forward with passion. Consider the old adage of "lighting a fire within her"; which speaks of that spark of passion and creativity within a person. Fire is a motivator! It is loaded with energy that is just begging to be released! This release could come in a destructive form; or, if directed so, can come in a much more creative and empowering form. 

DeviantArt.com

So, why should I care about this in MY life???

Often we may have a clear plan (for our business or spiritual life or relationship or whatever it is you're focusing on at the moment)... this is the earth element at work. 

But lack of forward progress, or feeling like you've hit a plateau, would mean you may want to add more of the fire element into your life. You need to get that spark of passion and get those creative juices flowing ~ and this is where the fire element comes in! And we've all been there! You know the steps you need to take to work your business or grow spiritually, but you're just not feeling it! Motivation has left the building! 

Every week I make a list of each of the things I have to do to work my business, for example. (Yes... every week it is- for the most part - the same items on that list!) But some weeks I'm just not feeling that spark to create a video, or even a blog post for that matter! I've hit a plateau. Nothing creative is coming to mind when I try to think of what I want to write about or speak about. And even worse than that, I am not "excited" about doing any of it! These are the times I need to add that fire element into my life! And I can tell you from my experience, that it is tremendously helpful!

How do you bring the fire element into your life?

In my opinion, the best way is to sit in front of a fire or even a candle flame and meditate a bit. Unfortunately, we don’t always have access to a bon-fire or even a fireplace in the home; but we often have candles around! While the heat is not nearly as intense, the flickering of the flame is just as mesmerizing. However, knowing this is not always practical and certainly not something that you can do all the time, there are some other ways to incorporate the element of fire into your life when you need a little more passion and spark!

Adding colors that correspond to the fire element to your wardrobe can have a significant effect. Wearing shades of red, orange, and yellow offer a constant reminder to your subconscious. Set your intention as you put that red shirt on in the morning, that you are asking for the fire element to be infused into your life today. 

Prepare foods with herbs that are associated with the fire element; again asking that as you consume these foods, that the fire element aids in bringing that spark back to your life that you desire. Some common herbs that are associated with fire include cinnamon, chili's, ginger and even garlic. 

Carry stones and crystals with you that are associated with the element of fire. It is best that they be near your body and touching your skin- if wear a bra they can be placed in there! If not, consider jewelry with these stones. You can place a few tumbled stones in your pocket and reach for them throughout your day, thereby touching them with your hands as well. Look for stones such as Jasper, Ruby and Bloodstone when looking for those associated with the fire element. Some of the less common options might be Volcanic Stone or Fire Opal. 

I challenge you to make a conscious effort to add the fire element into your life this week! Try one of the ideas we talked about above and watch the passion and creativity spark in your own life!

Share your experiences in the comments below! Check out my YouTube video which provides an overview of ALL of the elements!!

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Got Haters?? Good for you!!

Haters... we all have them! Even if you don't really KNOW you have them... it's most likely that you DO have at least ONE! 

For the most part, nobody likes the haters! We'd much rather surround ourselves with our tribe... our fans. Those are the ones who stand by us through thick and thin. They support our endeavors and encourage us to keep pressing forward. Those are our PEOPLE! 

But what of the haters? They make us feel crappy. They are completely un-supportive. They just lurk around, checking out what you're up to, so they can pass judgement. What can possibly be good about THAT?

Well, let's look at what's good about having a few haters! 

For one thing, haters love to see what you're up to! This means they are watching your videos and checking out your posts on social media! How does that help you? Well, they are actually increasing your view counts and helping to improve your analytics! Rock on haters!! 

Another way that those haters will help you is by sharing your stuff! Oh, now we know their intention is to share it with people they know to say "hey, look at what this psycho is up to now!"; but they are SHARING none-the-less! 

And what happens when they share? Well, the people that view THEIR shares are going to see YOUR posts and YOUR videos! And, they may be haters too! But they too are helping to improve your view counts and analytics! 

And sometimes, someone a hater shares to will take a look and think differently than the hater. Sometimes, that friend of the hater will be pretty impressed and wonder why the hater has so much hate. And that person will become an unknown ally; possibly a client. 

I know this all sounds pretty simplistic and easier said than done. The fact is that when a hater makes a negative comment or post directed towards you, it hurts. It's as though old wounds are opening and vinegar is being poured over them. It leaves a sting and that sting can send you crawling back into your hole filled with shame and fear of putting yourself out there again. 

But what if we changed our perception a bit? 

What if, instead of allowing those words from the haters to pierce the old wounds and re-open them; we altered our thinking and trained our brains to see them in a positive way?

What if we conditioned our minds to equate hateful comments with growth instead? Purposefully thinking, each time we encounter those negative people, that they are instrumental in our spiritual growth. So that rather than giving in to that "sting" we are able to push through it easier and in the process we become stronger. 

I challenge you to make a conscious effort to train your brain to associate the sting of a haters comment to personal growth and success. After all, we are in control of our mind and thus our emotional responses to our thoughts. So, take control! Run that "brain factory" the way YOU want it to be run... for YOUR highest good! 

Share your experiences in the comments below! Got Haters? That must mean you're on the right track!

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Can Kindness Heal?

Emotional Pain? Not I...

I do believe that many of our physical illnesses are made that much worse by the addition of emotional hurt and pain. I also believe that the only two (main) emotions that all of the other emotions come from; are fear and love. So, it makes sense to me that emotional pain stems from a place of fear and an absence of love, at a particular point in our lives. 

When someone hurts us it leaves an emotional scar deep in our inner most being. And this hurt and pain manifests itself in our lives through depression, sadness or withdrawn behavior. It may even rear its head through expressions of anger or resentment or even unkind words. 

Most days I don't consider myself to be in need of emotional healing. 'That's okay for others, but I'm good!' as I focus on growth and manifestation and all that positive stuff. But, then something happens. I may see a post on Facebook that is quite hurtful and hits a nerve. Or someone says something when I'm at the grocery store that has an air of nastiness to it. And it's at those times that I realize, that I, too, could use some emotional healing. Clearly, there are old wounds that open up during certain situations. 

Today I did some meditation as I normally do; but this time I took it a step further and channeled the goddess energy for insight. The primary message that I kept getting was to focus on love. But what the heck does that mean?? 

Often spirit speaks in a vague way! Mainly through symbols or short phrases, which can be a bit frustrating for left brain people! But what she was saying was so simple, in fact; that I just needed to accept it for its simplicity. 

She spoke of being kind and simply letting kindness enter your being.. your mind, your thoughts, your speech. As I am sarcastic by nature, showing kindness on a daily basis can be quite a challenge. That probably sounds very odd to the people that DO show kindness daily! 

So, what exactly does it mean to show kindness?

Part of showing kindness means to give of yourself. Even if all you can give is your time. By giving of yourself you are opening doors and making connections; human connections. And by showing kindness to others, you are in fact; showing kindness to YOURSELF. 

Not only does an act of kindness make someone else happy- it also does the same for you. When you show kindness, your brain releases a chemical called dopamine which produces happiness in YOU. Studies have also shown that acts of kindness can actually reduce stress levels; and we all know the health benefits of THAT! I was shown that this simple act can actually OPEN DOORS to emotional healing.

It sounds almost too simple. And yet, even though it IS simple; I realize that I have seen the effectiveness of it. You see, I use a pendulum to change energy in that way regularly. Using a pendulum, we can eliminate a negative and bring in a positive. When using it for emotional healing, we eliminate the negative emotion present and add in the corresponding positive emotion to replace it. 

Replacing emotional hurt and fear with love and kindness. 

But stepping outside of your comfort zone to show kindness can leave you open and vulnerable... vulnerable to even more hurt, right? No doubt, it is hard to show kindness when we are hurting emotionally. And yet, showing kindness is one way that we can begin to heal ourselves. Focusing on love and kindness rather than focusing on our inner pains and fears. Essentially, sending our energy outward to produce a positive effect INWARD. 

Just for today, let's be vulnerable and try to show some kindness to someone! In fact, let's challenge ourselves to make an effort to show ONE person some kindness each day. And watch the changes that occur in OURSELVES as we begin a journey towards emotional healing. 

Share your experiences in the comments below! What act of kindness did you show? How has it impacted YOU?

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Signs, Signs, Everywhere there's signs!

I need a SIGN!!

We often ask for signs. We ask our deities to show us signs for things. We ask our spirit guides to show us a sign. We, as humans, seem to need to see "signs" of so many things. Signs of the future. Signs that we are on the right path. 

I do believe that spirit gives us these signs. But I also believe that we oftentimes neglect to notice the signs that we are given. 

Most recently, I have been meditating on a certain topic repeatedly. I am not sure why I do it repeatedly, especially after having been shown signs already. Maybe I am looking for more concrete direction? A step by step breakdown of what's to come. But, alas, spirit will not hold my hand and walk down my path for me. That feat of humanity, I must do on my own. Hence, I have had to be grateful for the signs I requested, despite not being necessarily HAPPY with them! 

My Recent Signs...

Lately, the signs for me have been continually saying "4 months". I have had the four month concept come up on four separate occasions over the weekend. Four months... Spring time.... March... and for someone who lives in this day and age, waiting four months is a bit of a challenge to be honest. 

The first sign came when I was analyzing a friends' dream in which there was a birdhouse. A birdhouse in your dream can signify quite a few different things, but one of the things it signifies is the springtime. (Spring in the USA is around March and April). The next sign came when my significant other was telling me about HIS dream. In his dream, he was dismayed that his college aged daughter had kept the heads of lettuce that he had given her for FOUR months! In his dream, he kept explaining to her that "that lettuce is four months old, you have to get rid of it!"  Then, the same sign came to me more directly; not once, but TWICE; in my own dreams- with my spirit guides repeatedly telling me "four months". 

But, four months for WHAT exactly? And you see, that's just the tricky thing about getting signs... they are often much like getting clues to a hidden treasure- cryptic to say the least! 

Of course, it stands to reason that the answer of "four months" is the answer to the issue I was meditating on. And, I can also tell you that four months just seems so far away! 

In contemplating this - it occurred to me that the reason for my anxiety about it being four months away, lied more with the anxiety of what I would be doing for the three months BEFORE that time. And as we know, all emotions really only stem from TWO emotions - fear and love. This anxiety was clearly the result of fear. A fear of the unknown that was to occur within the next three months leading up to that fourth month. 

Let's Take a Second Look Here....

But then I looked at it from a different angle. I looked at it from the eyes of my spirit guides who showed me that information. If I were them, having just given a message of HOPE to someone, I would feel as though they were ungrateful for that message if they continued to perseverate on the unknown three months prior, rather than revel in the beauty and knowledge of the prize that is coming in four months. 

Well, I certainly don't want to be ungrateful. It's bad enough I had to be told four times in four different ways! So, I am making a conscious choice to NOT constantly think about the next three months and instead to revel and be appreciative of what is to come in four months! Will it be easy? Absolutely not!!! Not for this worry-wort!! It will be a challenge for sure. But if my spirit guides were patient enough with me to keep repeating the sign; then I can be patient with them and trust that the universe has a plan; and trust that the path that I am on is going to work out... 

What signs have been coming YOUR way lately? Have you been able to discern what they mean?

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Grateful, Thankful, Appreciative...

"I am Grateful. I am Thankful. I am Appreciative."

Don't these words just mean the same thing?

So often I hear people say they are "thankful" especially around this time of year. This got me thinking about the differences in being thankful, grateful and appreciative. I know you're thinking- 'what's the point? Aren't they all just the same thing really?' 

Well, I don't think they ARE the same. When we talk about manifesting, we also talk about how important it is to express gratitude and appreciation. So, if both of THOSE terms are mentioned, it stands to reason that there must be differences; albeit subtle ones!

Some references will tell you that being grateful and being thankful are synonyms for each other. And in today's day and age, they are often used interchangeably for sure. However, if we really analyse the words, we can see that they do in fact have some differences. 

Generally speaking, being grateful is a noun. This is something that we ARE... and often after the act of being thankful - which is the adjective. So, in essence, when we express thanks for something, we then become more grateful.

The same concept holds true for the word appreciative. Many sources will indicate that being appreciative is a synonym for being grateful. Appreciative is an adjective as in "showing appreciation".  One can truly only show appreciation for something that they are both thankful for AND grateful for. To show appreciation is to recognize and realize internally, the beauty or value of the thing which you are speaking of. 

Can you be one without being the other?

I can be thankful for my job, but certainly not be grateful for it or even appreciate it. However, if I am grateful for my job, then it stands to reason that I am also thankful for it and had expressed that thankfulness at some point. But, alas, I still may not be appreciative of it! 

I may be thankful for the dinner being served on Thanksgiving, but that in no way would mean that I had taken the time to really appreciate the food that is going to sustain my body. 

And, I certainly know that come Christmas time, my young children are thankful for the presents they receive- but are they grateful? Have they really internalized how grateful they are to receive presents? And going further, are they appreciative of those presents and what it may have taken in order to get them under the tree? Since many Christmas presents (toys in particular) become forgotten or stuffed away somewhere only a week or so after the holiday, I would have to say that gratefulness and appreciation are quite probably not in the mix!

So, what is the answer?

So, after much research into this I have come to the following conclusion: (particularly in regards to putting these concepts into action with the Law of Attraction and manifestation in our lives). 

I believe that the first step is to be grateful. This means that we need to really FEEL that feeling of thankfulness. Internalize it.  We start with a feeling of being grateful for what is before us. I believe this involves our senses in a way. So, we look at our home and realize we are grateful for having a roof over our heads. We hear our children and realize we are grateful for having people in our lives who love us. We smell the food cooking on the stove and realize that we are grateful for that food. And only then do we turn that inward feeling into an outward expression. When I am grateful for (the job, the person, etc.) I then express thanks to the universe for that thing and am able to realize more fully just HOW thankful I truly am. 

This brings us to being thankful. Being thankful is an outward expression of the feeling of gratefulness.  Whether that be to an individual, entity or even just putting it out to the universe. I believe that thankfulness is that outward expression. It is when we say to someone "Thank you" (for being there, for this job, etc. etc.). It is important to express this thankfulness regardless of circumstance when we want to manifest in our life. You may hate your job! But, there must be SOME aspect of that job that you are thankful for- even if it is ONLY that you get a paycheck every week. No matter what it is, express thanks for it. Verbalize it. Put it "out there" to the universe, God, the Goddess, your guides, whoever you choose. The important thing is that you express it. Sort of like saying an affirmation. In this step you are simply saying it. But, that alone will mean nothing until we move on to the other part.

Finally, we must have appreciation. Much like when one is looking at a piece of artwork, we must really feel how this gratitude we have impacts our lives. Once we have had that feeling of gratefulness and then taken the time to express it outwardly with thankfulness; we need to then simmer in that feeling so much so that it creates such an intense appreciation for it. To really appreciate it as one would appreciate great artwork, is the true meaning of this step. Realizing, acknowledging and understanding that your world and your life is a better place because of that thing which you are appreciating. 

I challenge you to mindfully take each of these words and make them real in your own life! As we spend time with families, friends and loved ones this season; take a moment to feel the gratefulness within you. Express the thankfulness and then take time to simmer in it and really appreciate it. Find something, ANYTHING, in your life that you feel gratitude towards. As you do this, I am certain that your life will be more abundant for it! Take a moment to share in the comments below some of the things in YOUR life that you are grateful for, express thanks for, and appreciate fully. 

~ Raven Haze Healing and Divination

Find me on the web at www.ravenhaze.com and on Facebook at Raven Haze Healing & Divination as well as my GROUP at Raven Haze Group

Manifesting when you're in a HOLE

How can I manifest when I am so deep in this hole??

I recently began to re-read the book Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself by Dr. Joe Dispenza. I feel like many of the books dealing with manifesting and changing our reality are all pretty similar. This one resonates well with me though because it really broke it down into how it is in fact scientific. The first chapter or two talk a lot about neurons and stuff. I originally skimmed through that to be honest! So, after reading a bit, I did some channeling last night and connecting with my spirit guides. I feel like the message I got is shareable to others.

Trying to dig yourself out of a hole

When we are struggling it's like we are in a hole and trying to get out. I was given the image of being in a deep hole with no visible way to get out of the hole. No ladder, no rope, nothing to be seen that would indicate a "plan of attack" to dig myself out. I heard the message that we keep asking about the same shit- how do I get out of this hole? What do I need to do to get out of this hole? And as such we are always manifesting stuff related to that hole. Never beyond it. Because that hole is where our focus is. That hole could be anything in your life. Financial struggle, emotional struggle, and even a mental struggle. It could be very different for each of us.

Rather than focusing on the hole and getting out of it- we should be focusing on 'already being out of the hole'. Moving and acting as though we are already out. In chapter 3 of Dr. Joe Dispenza's book, it talks about how Gandhi was acting as though there were peace in India for years before there was in fact peace. He made that his mental reality until it finally manifested into the physical realm. DESPITE our circumstances. Despite the existing reality. My existing reality may seem pretty shitty when looked at by any "normal" person. But in my mind- it's so different. And eventually that has no choice but to manifest. When I channeled I got the message from my spirit guides - why do you keep asking about finances? We got this! - My guides basically shut me down. As if to say 'don't you trust us?' "Move forward" stop focusing on the lack and start focusing on what's to come. That immediately brought a sense of peace that I literally felt deep in my gut. (And I've learned that I NEED to trust my gut as that is my clairsentience kicking in!)

But what about the HOW? How do we get out of that hole?

That was my question too. Always has been. And the answer I got was to never-mind the HOW.

I feel like it's a control thing. I am used to lists and taking control and managing shit. It's not easy to give up that control. I like to have a plan of action. But I need to release that control of the HOW to spirit. Imagine that you are already OUT of the hole. Without imagining how you got out. Skip that part of the story because that's already being taken care of by the guides.

Sounds crazy, I know! But that's the message I got. So I'm going with it for now. I'm not worrying or even really thinking too much about HOW I'll pay the rent or pay the car payment. I am trusting my guides that I will be able to. And it makes sense in a way because the more we focus on that HOW the less we are giving spirit the opportunity to take control. And the more we focus on it- the more we think about our circumstances as they currently ARE thereby reinforcing the same crap.

I "Want", I "Need", OR I "Have"??

The Law of Attraction and all that Hocus Pocus

I wanted to talk a bit today about setting your intention out into the universe and the law of attraction. I have heard so many people talk about how the law of attraction is pure rubbish lately. This made me really sit down and reflect on it. In fact, I actually meditated on it and was given (reminded of actually) some valuable insight from my spirit guides that I would like to share with you here.

I believe very strongly in the ability to manifest and I also believe very strongly in the law of attraction. What you put out there WILL come back to you at the same level of vibration that you are working in... whether it's good or bad, in your best interest or not. 

When you repetitively talk about how your job sucks... the universe will happily oblige you; though not likely in the way you anticipated! I've seen many instances where people (myself included) have spoken those kind of words regularly, only to find themselves fired or "let go" with no further job prospects. Guess what? That sucky job you were talking about... the universe has removed that from your life for you! 

I "Want"

When we go around saying or thinking "I want...." this, that or the other thing in our lives; we are putting that intention out into the universe with the idea that it will manifest itself. 

The problem with "I want" is that what you are putting out there is what you will get... more "want". 

I "Need"

The same holds true when we put out to the universe the intention that starts with "I need....". The universe already knows what you need. No point in perpetuating that concept! For example, if I put out my intention that "I need a new car"; what I am really putting out is the constant "need" for a car. And that is exactly what I will get back... continued NEED for a car. 

I "Have"

On the other hand, when we put out to the universe the intention with the phrase "I have" we will attract the same! The universal law of attraction states that "like attracts like". So, it stands to reason that if I put out the intention that "I have a reliable and attractive vehicle that I am blessed with", I will be putting out that intention on the same vibrational level as that which I am truly seeking... a reliable and attractive vehicle! 


I have a client who had come to me in complete frustration over this. She told me she has been putting her intention out into the universe for a solid relationship for the past year and nothing has ever manifested for her! She was at her wits end! We discussed it a bit further and I asked her to tell me what it was she was "putting out there". Her mantra was "I want a committed man who will love me and honor me for a long-term, lifetime romantic relationship". She was a step ahead of the game in making her intention specific; but what was she actually putting out into the universe? The constant feeling of WANT. She was indeed manifesting exactly what she put out there! She had a constant WANT for the past year! We changed her mantra a bit to say "I HAVE" instead, and I am quite confident that this will change her outcome sooner rather than later!

So What's the Take Home Message Here?

In order for the law of attraction to be effective, it's super important HOW we phrase our intentions! Bearing in mind that words have meaning and words have POWER! Does it feel like you're lying somewhat? Probably! But in a way, as the old adage goes: FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT. In other words, put that intention out into the universe as though it has already manifested and REALLY feel the emotion of what it WILL BE like when it DOES manifest! 

Keep your vibration at the same level of that which you want to bring INTO your life. And above all, express GRATITUDE and APPRECIATION for all that you have and all that is to come!

What are some of the things that you've ATTRACTED into YOUR life with the Law of Attraction? Were they good things or have you had some experiences with inadvertently attracting the more negative things? Share your experiences in the comments below!!

Find me on the web at Raven Haze Healing and Divination and on Facebook Fan Page. Looking for more discussions? Then check out my closed Facebook group: Raven Haze GROUP

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